Never The Same
“Something To Remind You” by Staind
“But I know, somehow, that only when it is dark enough can you see the stars.”
- M.L. King
Nothing will ever be the same again. I know that is stating the obvious but every single day I am reminded of just how harsh that reality is.
No smile, no laugh, no joy will ever feel the same. Because there is only one way to fix it and that can never happen.
No one can ever bring me my children. My daughter and my son. No one can put them in my arms again. No one can let me see them, talk to them, kiss them, hug them, tell them how much I love them...
So even though life goes on, even though there are moments of happiness... its not the same.
But I can feel time passing. I can see the hour glass that is my life and there is more sand at the bottom of the glass than there is at the top.
Time is running out. My time here as a son, a brother, a husband, a father... its terrifyingly short. I cannot - for the sake of my children and all of those I love with all my heart - stand by and watch these days just go by.
No things will not be the same but nor would I want them to. I don’t want to live a life where Graham and Savannah don’t mean everything to me. And if that means heartache, if that means crying while driving home from work, if that means telling stories of what they would have been like... I will take it. This is my reality and I accept it and I will embrace it.
I absolutely cannot stand the thought of not making the most out of life. I have always felt that way but because of Graham and Savannah it has become an obsession. They cant be here to laugh and smile and love the way I wanted them to... so I will do it for them. How can I squander opportunities in this world that my poor babies never had?
That doesn’t mean climbing Everest (necessarily) or money or material things... it means smiling more. It means loving more. It means being honest even when honesty isn’t convenient. It means righting the wrongs of the past by making a better today and future for my family and friends.
No things will not ever be the same and a lot of that will be trying to mend a wound that can never be healed.
But I am Graham and Savannah’s father. I am what they never had a chance to be on this earth. And I will not waste that.
Time to get to work...
G&S <3 Forever
“But I know, somehow, that only when it is dark enough can you see the stars.”
- M.L. King
Nothing will ever be the same again. I know that is stating the obvious but every single day I am reminded of just how harsh that reality is.
No smile, no laugh, no joy will ever feel the same. Because there is only one way to fix it and that can never happen.
No one can ever bring me my children. My daughter and my son. No one can put them in my arms again. No one can let me see them, talk to them, kiss them, hug them, tell them how much I love them...
So even though life goes on, even though there are moments of happiness... its not the same.
But I can feel time passing. I can see the hour glass that is my life and there is more sand at the bottom of the glass than there is at the top.
Time is running out. My time here as a son, a brother, a husband, a father... its terrifyingly short. I cannot - for the sake of my children and all of those I love with all my heart - stand by and watch these days just go by.
No things will not be the same but nor would I want them to. I don’t want to live a life where Graham and Savannah don’t mean everything to me. And if that means heartache, if that means crying while driving home from work, if that means telling stories of what they would have been like... I will take it. This is my reality and I accept it and I will embrace it.
I absolutely cannot stand the thought of not making the most out of life. I have always felt that way but because of Graham and Savannah it has become an obsession. They cant be here to laugh and smile and love the way I wanted them to... so I will do it for them. How can I squander opportunities in this world that my poor babies never had?
That doesn’t mean climbing Everest (necessarily) or money or material things... it means smiling more. It means loving more. It means being honest even when honesty isn’t convenient. It means righting the wrongs of the past by making a better today and future for my family and friends.
No things will not ever be the same and a lot of that will be trying to mend a wound that can never be healed.
But I am Graham and Savannah’s father. I am what they never had a chance to be on this earth. And I will not waste that.
Time to get to work...
G&S <3 Forever
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